Answer: Mr. Monk, the TV detective who suffers from Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD), and Jack Nicholson, as the compulsive hand-washer in the film "As Good As It Gets," are extreme examples of people who are constantly anxious unless they can be sure everything is in order so they can feel safe. Many of us have milder versions of rituals, superstitions and compulsions that, when not carried out, can make us irritable with our partner, children and co-workers.

Usually such habits and anxieties begin during the "magical thinking" stage of childhood. In the child's normal development, he or she attempts to understand and give order to an overwhelming world by making rules and rituals, such as "Step on the crack, break your mother's back." If something awful or unexpected happens, children tend to hold on to those memories and to repeat rituals in an attempt to protect themselves and their families. If some wonderful surprise happens, children tend to repeat whatever preceded the event, much the way athletes may wear their lucky clothes or follow the same routines before a big game.

The mind likes things to be predictable so it can efficiently activate a process that prepares you for survival or effectiveness. Your brain uses predictions to subconsciously prepare you to react quickly to danger or opportunities, but can keep you stuck repeating reactions that worked in the past but are not suitable for today's world and your adult skills.

To break free of these negative habits, you can consciously question your superstitions and predictions and consciously choose to face the consequences of breaking the ritual. You can also use deep breathing and relaxation techniques to calm your body and prove to yourself that it's safe to exhale and stay where you are. You will need to repeat this process several times until your brain makes the correction (like changing and updating a "default" setting on your computer). More severe cases may require several sessions of Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy.

You may find that changing your belief system about what you can and cannot control in life will help reduce the fantasy that constantly putting things in order will save you from normal mistakes. Letting go of trying to be perfect and trying to control life will go a long way toward accepting yourself as a perfectly normal human being. After all, we are equipped with many ways to survive and thrive in this world without worrying, becoming hyper-vigilant, and adding unnecessary stress to our lives and those of our loved ones.

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