The Singles' Valentine's Day Survival Kit
Our dating analyst has ways to survive Valentine's Day, if you don't have a significant other
By Julia Allison
Dating Columnist, Time Out New York
Updated: Apr 10, 2008
Last week I received an email from a reader named Maria, who wrote that Valentine's Day made her "want to vomit." She and most of her friends were single, she explained, and they found it "gross how people try to have a boyfriend" just in time for this particular holiday.
She ended her missive with a plea: "Is there any way you could write something not cheesy but not so bashing for this time of year?" Hmmm. Not cheesy but not so bashing. That's a fine line to walk, Miss Maria.
Personally, I have always loved and continue to love Valentine's Day. It's not that I've had such mind-blowing romantic experiences --
I actually spent one February 14th eating frosting out of a can.
I actually spent one February 14th eating frosting out of a can. By myself. Doesn't matter! I'm still a fan.
In fact, the idea that anyone could get cranky about a holiday created to celebrate love is beyond me. What's with the pent-up rage? The bitterness? The cynicism?
CommercializationComplain all you want about 'commercialization,' but there's nothing wrong with a reminder to treat the loved ones in our lives with a little bit of extra care and consideration, and sure, some flowers and a card too.
According to a Telefora survey,
79 percent of Americans consider themselves 'romantic'
79 percent of Americans consider themselves 'romantic' -- and yet, 48 percent didn't send flowers, 66 percent neglected to write a love letter, 42 percent didn't plan a romantic holiday, and 32 percent didn't cook a romantic meal.
How sweet of us! (Please note heavy sarcasm) Despite the whining, it seems like we do need a date on the calendar to jog our romantic memories. And really, why complain about it? I'm quite sure you can find something else to criticize in this world.
Significant other
If you're grumbling because you don't have a significant other, there are plenty of other people in your life
If you're grumbling because you don't have a significant other, there are plenty of other people in your life who might appreciate a Valentine's Day celebration -- your best friend, your sister, your grandmother -- even yourself.
On my Valentine's Day list? A cute pink iPod nano, a ticket to the New York City Ballet, Crabtree & Evelyn rose hand lotion and an enormous bouquet of roses.
And no, despite trendy rumblings of the 'roses are cheesy' crowd, no woman is ever, ever upset at receiving a bouquet.
As for a love letter, forget the Hallmark cards and don't even THINK about sending an email. Instead, go down to Kate's Paperie or Papyrus and find something really beautiful and unique, then actually write on it. You know, with a pen.
While you're at it, send a Valentine to the people who most deserve to hear you say 'I love you' - your mom and dad. Aww.
Happy Valentine's Day.
More Julia AllisonJulia Allison is the editor-at-large for
Star Magazine and
Time Out New York's dating columnist. She appears daily as an on-air commentator on Fox, E!, CNN, MSNBC, CBS, and has written for Cosmopolitan, Maxim, New York, Teen Vogue, Seventeen, The Huffington Post and Men's Health. Julia got her start as the first college dating columnist at Georgetown University. Read her blog at
blog.juliaallison.com. Comments? Email
JuliaAllison1@gmail.com.
