Marge: Do you like his humor and strong opinions? I know this is hard for your sons to grasp, since they've been the center of your world for the last 15 to 20 years, but the relationship is for you. If this man makes you happy, then he stays. It may help to point out to your sons a few of their friends/girlfriends who you find irritating, just to illustrate that we don't always approve of each other's choices. We each have different needs, things we like about people, and things that annoy us. Discussing this may help.

Also, you need to know that it is VERY common for kids to start pointing out faults as soon as they feel you are getting serious with someone. They are afraid for many reasons: they don't want to see you hurt again, and it is nice to have you all to themselves! I know it can be disconcerting to have those closest to your heart criticizing your choice, but this is one time where you can teach your children a valuable lesson. Your life is your own. You don't need their approval, although you might prefer their support. You've spent many long years raising them, and you've earned the right to focus on your own needs.