In the "Sex and the City" movie, Miranda functions as a friend-turned-frenemy and helps derail her friend's dream wedding. At a strategic point in the upcoming nuptials, she verbally puts down the idea of marriage to the commitment-phobic groom! In this one act, Miranda puts a nail in the coffin of her best friend's dream. In case you haven't seen the movie, I won't reveal how things do turn out, but there are lessons learned from this scene.

First of all, finding love is a challenge; and unfortunately, friends and family members can sometimes make it even tougher. When people in your inner circle become negative, pessimistic, competitive, jealous, or don't show you appreciation and/or encouragement, it inflames your own doubts and fears. If you're in a new romantic relationship, these reactions can come on suddenly; they may be familiar and ingrained parts of lifetime relationships that are so subtle, you may not even be fully aware of them. In either case, unsupportive reactions toward your date and you can pull you both back into being hopeless about love. In extreme cases, they can sabotage a growing relationship, as Miranda did in the "Sex and the City" movie! And if you're not dating someone currently, negative feedback from people close to you can even stop you from getting back in the dating scene or dating altogether.

A friend who feeds you negativity isn't a friend, but a frenemy. A frenemy may be chipping away your dating potential without you even being aware of it. Ask yourself, do any of these incidents sound familiar?

These are typical behaviors of friends-turned-frenemies. Here are four steps to use to handle frenemies and protect your love life:

Who do you spend the most time with socially? Regarding the people close to you, answer the following questions:

Often you are unconsciously encouraging your frenemies to be negative by complaining to them about what is wrong with your love life. For three days, take a notebook and make a note of every time you complain to anyone. For the next three days complain to no one. Write about how this feels.

For example, you may need your best friend to stop complaining about how awful men/women are. You may need your dad/mom to tell you what he/she really likes about your new date.

Be straight and honest. Tell them you want to have a positive outlook about love and you need them to be positive too. Most will respond. With the few frenemies who resist and continue being negative, move to a more distant, yet polite, relationship with them. You have to protect yourself and your own hopeful outlook on love.

Anyone can make a mistake and can turn frenemy on you. But if this does happen, follow these steps, and you will find that you can turn things back around so that you have a truly supportive posse. And by the way, if you and your wonderful posse would like to see if your dating patterns are more like Carrie, Samantha, Charlotte, or Miranda, take my free quiz at www.mydatingpatterns.com.