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10 Turnoffs that Make Great Gals Wave Goodbye

By Jeff Cohen Updated: Dec 27, 2008
Jeff Cohen
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Most guys know from the get-go whether or not they see potential in a woman. There's that inner voice that tells you this is someone worth pursuing.
When the first date ends, you're not even thinking about playing games. You know you want a second date. You wait your standard two days, call to set up that date and get the dreaded voicemail.
You leave a heartfelt message, but after three days it becomes clear this great gal is not calling you back. Where did you go wrong?
“Were you the only one feeling sparks over lattes?”
Were you the only one feeling sparks over lattes?
Top 10 turnoffs for women
Maybe the answer is to learn the top 10 turnoffs that make great gals wave goodbye. If any of these fictional guys sound like you, it's time to change your approach.
Great Gal Turnoff #1: Showboat Sammy
Maybe he owns a yacht off the coast of France. Maybe he has a timeshare in the Hamptons. Maybe his annual bonus is bigger than most guys' salaries. That's all well and good, but does it really need to be divulged on the first date?
Great Gal Turnoff #2: Messy Melvin
A-list celebrities can pull off the unkempt look. First-daters need to pay attention to shaving, clothing and bad breath. If the guy can't even put in the effort for a first impression, it doesn't bode well down the road.
Great Gal Turnoff #3: Rude Ricky
"Where's our drinks, lady?" If a guy treats the service staff with a lack of respect, a great gal will likely assume he'll do the same to her someday.
“The last thing anyone wants is to be talked down to or disrespected.”
The last thing anyone wants is to be talked down to or disrespected.
Great Gal Turnoff #4: Cheapie Charlie
There will always be debate about who should pay on a first date. Some guys are traditionalists and want to foot the bill; others expect a 50-50 monetary split. In most cases, offering to pay is the way to go. Let her pick up the tab on a future date.
Great Gal Turnoff #5: Still-Married Michael
Marriage, separation and divorce are pretty cut-and-dry terms. If a guy says he's separated when he really means he's cheating on his wife, it's going to cause trouble. Be honest from the get-go and let the dating chips fall where they may.
Great Gal Turnoff #6: Hands-On Howie
Guys need to read the signals before assuming hand holding, massaging and other touchy-feely activities have the green light.
“Jumping too quickly to any form of intimacy can make any guy seem too aggressive.”
Jumping too quickly to any form of intimacy can make any guy seem too aggressive.
Great Gal Turnoff #7: Stereotyping Stephen
"Oh, you're one of those types of women." Jumping to conclusions about a date from the way she answers one or two questions is a definite mistake. Let the date unfold before making assumptions about someone you just met.
Great Gal Turnoff #8: Distracted David
His cell phone is ringing constantly, he's popping away from the table every 10 minutes, and he keeps interrupting the conversation flow. First dates require focused attention -- that means putting the phone on vibrate, making eye contact and being present.
Great Gal Turnoff #9: All-Business Barry
Some guys are great salesmen or outstanding negotiators. But there's a time and place for business and a time and place for leisure. Guys who treat first dates like business transactions will never close the deal.
Great Gal Turnoff #10: Nervous Ned
He can't sit still, he's banging his fork on the table, and he won't make eye contact for more than three seconds. Nervous antics are a real turnoff and make a great gal think a guy has something to hide. Work out the nervous kinks before the date starts.
What are the "10 Turnoffs That Make Good Guys Wave Goodbye"? See them here
Dating, Inc.
Jeff Cohen is the author of "
Dating, Inc.," a that shows women a step-by-step plan for finding true love using the same skills that already make them successful at work. Jeff has appeared on CNN, CBS, and Voice of America, and been interviewed by USA Today, Daily News, Denver Post, the Chicago Tribune, the Boston Herald, and Martha Stewart Living Radio. He earned degrees in marketing from the Wharton School of Business and psychology from the University of Pennsylvania and readily admits taking charge of his love life through a game plan that included 77 blind dates before he found the one.
Leave a comment COMMENTS50 COMMENTS
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true...
A Yahoo! Contributor
1. Who do you think the woman&#39;s going to date, a guy with a 2009 Mustang, or some crappy little hand-me-down? OF COURSE women are initially attracted by a guy&#39;s huge paycheck. It&#39;s not what makes them want to stay, but EVERYONE is attracted by wealth, otherwise no one would be wealthy at all. 2. If that&#39;s true, why am I seeing ugly/unkept guys getting as much action as the well-groomed? 3. If women didn&#39;t love rude guys, then they&#39;d stop falling for them and the NICE GUYS of the world wouldn&#39;t have a problem. Quite clearly, this is not the case. 4. No-brainer. How is this &quot;information&quot; going to help you get that FIRST date? 5. If you&#39;ve been married, then you don&#39;t NEED any love advice. You&#39;ve already gotten that far, so you already have some idea of what you&#39;re doing. 6. Says you. Conversely, half of everyone else says that you need to subtly touch her right away to get across the idea that she&#39;s wanted and desirable, and you&#39;re interested. 7. The point of dating is to learn about your date. If she answers a few questions that reveals her being a ditzy airhead, what are the odds that she ISN&#39;T? Have you ever been to a Hooters restauarant? It would take 3 of &quot;those kinds of girls&quot; just to tie one of the girls&#39; shoes, then 2 more to figure out why the other two girls&#39; shoes are still untied. 8. Another no-brainer. No one is going to do anything other than pay his date with every shred of attention he can muster. 9. Tell that to the guys who can turn on charisma like a tap of cold water. 10. What about the guys who are so nervous about dating that the women can&#39;t help but find them endearingly cute? My own sister has fallen prey to the supposed cuteness of dating ineptitude.
A Yahoo! Contributor
Hey! Don&#39;t forget about Low Confidence Larry. If you don&#39;t value yourself enough to think &quot;I&#39;m she must like me otherwise I wouldn&#39;t be out with her right now!&quot; we 1) pick up on it right away and 2) hate it.
A Yahoo! Contributor
I liked the stereotyping one which can also be called the know it all. It deserves to be called on more cause it appears to be one of the guys&#39; favorite things to do (to me at least) and it is definitely a deal breaker. guy from comment number 2 seems to be one of those guys..
A Yahoo! Contributor
I bet the two guys who have such conflicting information from what was written are single. LOL!
A Yahoo! Contributor
Haha thats funny i thought it would be different but those are good!
A Yahoo! Contributor
Man, that guy 2 posts below me just owned thewriter...good stuff.
No Photo
OK guy who posted on comment 2 has a lot to learn. I have NO desire to date someone who is rich. I want a man who is financially stable, but that does mean he needs to drive a fancy car or own a mansion. I rather be rich in love. There are golddiggers out there which is obviously the girls you have been dating.
A Yahoo! Contributor
how hard is it to pick up a girl with a 2009 mustang?? a true pimp can pick up a girl in a 1989 toyota rust bucket.
A Yahoo! Contributor
Lets just call it what it is, an interview. Dating sucks
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